A whole new world
by CrackonKappacumbers
Summary: au, Masaomi is a homeless man in Ikebukuro's sand lands and his life is encountered by an evil man who comes/corrupts his life to search for a lamp which really became a cell phone. For that lamp had a blue genie sleeping in it. Izaya is our villian in the story & maybe he win. Shizuo is a princess/prince of bukuroland but he needs to be married to break his curse. R&R is luv-kl


**Purple monkey dish washer c: Ooo ah ah.**

Once, in the sandy old days of Ikebukuro, there was a dark man, waiting. With a dark purpose. A evil man, named Izaya Orihara. Who was also on a dark jean horse. With a bird thing on his shoulder. A person on another jean horse rode off to him, hopping off and facing the man.

"You are late." The evil man said bitterly, his red ruby eyes gittered. Izaya was wearing long robes and black and red, matching his evil villian role with the right colours of intimating to others, he also wore a hat to match his clothes.

"Yo yo man I had to kill people! but I got it." Hiroshi revealed half a cucumber, taking out of his inside pocket of his hoodie.

As evil man was about to snatch it, Hiroshi swiped it away from his reach.

"Nah man, gimme my money." Hiroshi posed, the bird then swiped the cucumber from his hand, "Ow man." and gave it into Izaya's hand.

"Yeah you'll get it soon." He pulled out the other half, and clicked them together. It started to glow with kappaness and grew wings of freedom, flying into a direction of where it would be leading to.

Izaya reacted instantly. "Quickly, follow the trail!" They both rode off with their horses, and followed the cucumber flying quickly.

It then stopped, and went into a pile of sand. A giant kappa head rose from the sand, opening it's mouth.

"Yes, here it is the cave of Kappa!" Izaya stated in victory. The two men stood in the presence of the cave.

"By the Dollars yo." Hiroshi wowed.

"Now," Izaya started pointing a sharp knife blade at Hiroshi "get in there, and die- I mean, retrieve the lamp." Izaya hoped he didn't hear that. "You can have everything else, but just bring me the lamp."

Hiroshi walked up to the cave with confidence but, the kappa's nose then snorted at Hiroshi, and he flew off leaving with no success.

The eyes of the kappa sand mold started to glow green.

"Who you." The kappa head talked to Hiroshi.

"Oh, hey man, I'm Hiroshi, the big boss man." Hiroshi stated and posed.

"You know this. Or you should know this. Only one may enter in my kappaness. Only the banana of the bandanas may enter here, you dope." The head said.

"Well, that solves that, let's go home ya'll." Hiroshi was about to abandon his mission.

"No! go in there and die- I mean, retrieve the lamp, secretly. Well, go on." _You idiot_ Izaya internally sighed and facepalmed at Hiroshi's act.

Hiroshi gulped and nervously tip toed to the cave, and carefully took a step into the mouth beak.

Nothing happened. Until suddenly the Kappa shouted a **hm**, and ate up Hiroshi while falling apart of the shape of the head.

Izaya screamed **noooo**, shielding himself from the sand explosion.

"You must seek, the banana of the bandanas, the bandanas the, nana in the nana.." The kappa cave echoed, slowly his voice faded.

"Well, it looks like we need to find this banana." The brown and black tiped feathered bird, Erika spoke.

"Yes, we must find this, banana of the bandanas. Wow that sounds stupid." Izaya replied.

**c: time skip in another place.**

"STOP YOU! I'LL HAVE YOUR HANDS FOR A TROPHY, STREET BANANA!" Togusa, the head guard shout out at Masaomi on the roof tops.

Togusa is the one shouting, had a turban with poofy pants and straps on his chest holding up a sword angryly with some other guards for Masaomi had stolen a banana from a stand. And as a bonus, he scratched Togusa's van.

"All this for a banana?" Masaomi questioned. He had a fez, stitched white pants, and a open blue coat with no sleeves. Without hesitation, he jumped off the roof, "Whoaaaaa" breaking through clothes and banners, breaking his fall.

"YOU WON'T GET AWAY SO EASY!" One of the guards shouted out from the roof.

Namie and another lady giggled, seeing Masaomi covered with clothes.

"Morning ladies." Masaomi flashed a smile

"Getting into trouble early today aren't you, Masaomi.." Namie shook her head.

"Trouble? nah, you only get in trouble if you get caught." Masaomi ran, suddenly the head guard grabbed him, they got down the building some how.

"Caught you, street banana." Togusa hissed.

"Now I'm in trouble."

"Now this time!-" Just then, a little light brown haired monkey who hanged on a balcony with his tail pulled his hat down his head, making it hard for him to see.

It was Shinra. He laughed and pointed at Togusa, who was struggling to get the hat properly on.

"Perfect timing Shinra, as usual." Masaomi gave his thanks to his friend, the monkey.

Shinra had clothes similar to Masaomi, but without pants, instead he had glasses.

"Now let's get outta here." To that Shinra swinged off, and followed along with Masaomi, hopping on to his shoulder.

"Gotta keep." Masaomi bumped into a guard.

"One jump, ahead of the banana line, one swing, ahead of a sword." The guard tried to chop Masaomi, but he dodged around singing for some reason, looks like he caught on some habits.

"I steal, only when I can't afford, and that's everything, seriously." The guard's pants slipped off, then he chased after Masaomi in anger and embrassment.

"One jump, ahead of the law man, that's all, and that's no joke." Masaomi ran to a board, while another guard tried to slash at him, hitting the board. He ran up a bunch of barrels and the guards followed up.

"These guys, don't appreciate I'm broke, why." Masaomi kicked off the barrels on them, making them fall down, covered in rum. The guards now sang some parts along.

"Rift raft." Two guards spoke pointing up to him.

"Street banana." Two more sang with distaste.

"Scoundrel." Three more sang, while Masaomi climbed up a tower.

He looked at them, the guards threw fruits at him but missed falling on some other Ikebukurians. "TAKE THAT!"

"Just a little snack, guys. please?" They now threw swords at him, but it hit the planks as Masaomi blocked behind it.

"Rip him open, take it back guys!" The guards shook the tower, "I can take a hint, gotta face the facts."

But Masaomi jumped off, like it was planned. Shinra caught Masaomi, hanging from a plank on a wall with his tail again somehow... it must've been his magic monkey strength.

Shinra swung them both into an open window.

"You're my only friend, Shinra." They appeared in a room filled with dancing highschool aged girls. They sang.

Shinra noticed some tomatoes in a bowl, and shoved them in his face trying to hide it.

"Who? Oh, it's sad Masaomi's hit the bottom, he's the number one man that's in crime." The girls danced and twirled around Masaomi, in blue -known as Saki- purple -known as Rio- and pink sexy outfits. Then he bumped into the guardian of the three girls, with an unamused face on.

"I blame parents, but except he hasn't got em! they died." As Masaomi was about to put his hat off to greet her, she tried to swung a broom at him, he ducked and was now unamused, taking the hat back on.

"Jeez, thank for thinking of my feelings, and just saying they died." Masaomi replied in non-song to the lady.

"Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat, tell you all about it when I got the time." Masaomi sneaks back to the girls and sits on the window still, with one last smile. The pink dressed girl, named Mika pushed him out the window with Shinra, and they bounced off a merchant top with ease.

He then was behind a strong man, following his moves to hide, until he made a mistake and ran off.

"One jump ahead of the slowpokes, one skip, ahead of my doom, next time gonna use a nom de plume." He skips away with Shinra on his shoulder again with the banana.

"THERE HE IS!" Togusa spotted him, Masaomi jumped on sheep to get across an area while all the guards threw them away instead.

The sheep were not amused.

"One jump ahead of the hit men, one hit ahead of the flock. I think I'll take a stroll around the block." Masaomi crossed, and jumped over a man hanging around on spikes.

Three guards jumped across, unfortunately the last guard jumped on the man and he screamed.

* * *

><p>Masaomi ran up to get to a house, grabbed a carpet, deciding to end the chase.<p>

"Gotta put my hand in, wish me happy landing, all I gotta do is jump!" Masaomi jumped off with Shinra on the carpet, the guards tried to catch it, but they were sad little flightless birds that could not float or fly so they fell down with a loud cry of pain.

Masaomi unwrapped the carpet, taking the ends of it and turning it into a parachute down, and they safely landed on ground in an ally way.

"Hurray, we got two bananas, now we feast alright yeah." Masaomi handed a banana to Shinra. He hugged it in joy.

They both peeled it, as Masaomi was about to take a bite out of his own kind.

He notices a girl with short black hair and a boy with lighter brown hair who were broke and hungry apparently, looking in a jar to find some scraps, finding nothing but fish bones.

Anri and Seiji looked at them shyly, envy of their eat. Masaomi looked at Shinra. He knew what he was going to do. He swung his banana away from him, and chewed on it greedily with a face.

Masaomi felt bad, and stood up, walking toward them.

"Here you go, go on take the banana." Masaomi lend out the banana. The girl took it, happy, softly giggling. To that, the two shared his offering.

Masaomi went to go see what was happening in a crowd.

Shinra looked at the banana, and now felt bad. "Oh.." He came across them, and lazily put up the banana for them to take it.

The boy, Seiji took it. While Anri, the girl pet Shinra.

"Ah, don't." The boy was now playing around with him.

"Ehehehe." Shinra went, childishly slapping the boy's hands away.

"Huh?" Shinra went to go see what was going on leaping onto Masaomi's shoulder.

"Oh, look, a jean with something on it." Masaomi pointed at it with his pointer.

"The fuq man." Went a man that was in front of him, it was a gang member.

"It's another suitor for the princess, are you blind?" Said another.

"No, that's a jean, horse in your terms and that thing, it's a poofy man." Kida explained.

"You crazy man." Is the response he just with a face made from the other guy.

There was a jean with something on it, a poofy dressed man with shiny stuff. The jean walked toward a gate to a palace in just "elegance and gracefulness".

Just then, the boy slipped through the crowd and ran toward the poofy man, his name was Prince Takashi, he had brown hair and a weird hat.

Anri tried to grab him, they stumbled upon his path. He held out a whip. Why you have a whip, Takashi.

"Get out of my way, FILTHY BRATS!" Masaomi went into action, and blocked the hit with his arm. The two hurried away.

"Hey, if I were as rich as you, I could afford some manners." Masaomi threw it back at him, he catched it in disgust.

"I'LL TEACH YOU SOME MANNERS!" The jean rider knocked them both into a mud pile. Masaomi recovered quickly and Shinra bleched at the mud.

Masaomi couldn't do anything, so he just said this. He really ran out of ideas.

"Look at his hat aheaheahaea." He really did ran out of ideas, must have been from that banana chase. The man turned around. He didn't like having his hat insulted.

"You, are a worthless street clown, you were born a street clown, you will die a street clown, and only your fleas will mourn you!" Takashi continued walking into the palace gates.

Masaomi got angry, and wanted to get him, standing up and running to the gate, but it closed on him.

"I ain't a clown, it's street banana to you fool, I'm not worthless, and I don't have fleas, I think..." Masaomi scratched his head, and slowly realized what he was doing, he stopped with a sigh.

"Come on Shinra, let's go." Masaomi and Shinra went on home.

**c: time skip to night**

They walked up to their "home." He now started singing again.

"Rift raft, street clown, I don't buy that, if only they looked closer. Would they see a poor boy? no siree. Or they'd find out." The place was little, but good shelter with a giant front window showing the city.

Shinra popped his hat off, and slept. Masaomi put over a blanket on him.

"There's so much more, to me." Shinra went snoring away. Turning in his sleep onto his back and draping his arms around and about with some drool. Masaomi opened the gaint curtain that takes off most of his home space to show the sight of the palace in the view at night.

"Shinra, one day we're gonna live in a palace, and have no problems at all." Kida gave that last speech to cheer himself up before he went to dream his own dream that night.

**c: time skip tomorrow at the palace**

**Bam!**

"Oh, oh, I have never to be so insulted." Prince Takashi stompped out of the garden enterance.

Walker worried and stood up from his chair of power.

"Wait what what you can't be leaving right now." Walker spoke for once. He had sultan robes and a great big turban of white. When the sand land storm came to Ikebukuro, he took the place of being sultan than king to fit in the theme of the place.

"Good luck marrying him! hmph." He stormed out of the place. His pants were ripped showing his underwear. It had kappa patterns on it.

Yes, Shizuo Hei-wa-lker is the princess um, prince of Ikebukuro sand lands, and it seems, he always will make the suitor prince leave with embrassment, this was the eigth suitor this week. And there's still nothing. Walker sighs.

"Ooooh Shizuo.."Walker walked over to Shizuo, who was flocking his hand in the fountain outside in the garden.

"Shizuo, Shizuo-" There he saw him with his blonde hair, but then Tom the tiger went in front of him with the leftover prince's kappa underwear. Growling at Walker.

"God damn it you kill him, Tom, how could you." Tom and sultan walker did tug of war, and the underwear ripped apart.

"So this is why Takashi stormed out you..Shizuo, I know you're a tsudere, but really?" Walker held up the piece he had up to Shizuo's face with an unamused face. Tiger Tom went up to Shizuo, to be petted. Shizuo smiled at Tom.

"Yeah, no, Tom was just playing with him, with that stupid over grown poofy dressed man." Shizuo had blue short clothing top, some parts see-through silk with cut out parts, showing his belly button and stomach. Poofy pants, a crown headpiece of some sort and golden shoes. Shizuo hugged Tom like a pushie.

Walker was not amused. Really not.

"Shizuo, you have to be married by some guy it's the law."

"Well I don't care." Shizuo plainly replied. Walker judged his response with another one.

"Well you have to. You must be married by your next birthday. Or you will be cursed foreva, wooo." Walker responses with a ghost noise at the end.

"wat. But Walker if I do get married, I want it to be for love." Shizuo answered honestly now.

"Eugh I'll have to force you to get married by your birthday if you still haven't decided."

"Aw." Shizuo's mood was saddened.

Poor papa Walker went back inside the palace walls.

**end of chapter 1 c:**

**To be continued**

**shizukida moments later**

**and izuo stuff too.**

**bye kappalings**

**-kappalord c:**


End file.
